Lets try this again.

So.. last year I started The Happiness Project Experience for a few reasons. Mostly, surprise surprise, because I was unhappy. I had gone through a particularly painful breakup that no one knew about, I wasn’t happy with the person I had become, and I felt I needed something to occupy myself and keep me from thinking about where my life was compared to where I wished it was.

I stumbled hard in May. Fell flat on my face in fact. “Work” was the theme for the month, and I just didn’t want to face that particular subject at that particular point in time.

I also started to see a therapist around Easter last year, which of course has helped immensely, so I think I am in a position to really focus on myself again and put in the work to find the things that bring me joy. That aren’t reliant on someone else. This time around I am doing this for me, not just to try and prove to someone else I can be happy, no matter how much I was told I never was. But at that point in time, they were right.

I did however learn a lot in how I want to approach this again this year. I overwhelmed myself last year and put far too much pressure on myself to keep my resolutions. I will keep them far simpler this year, and won’t be so damned hard on myself if I don’t. It just means that it either doesn’t mean enough to me, or just isn’t achievable for whatever reason.

So, January was about Self-knowledge.

My resolutions were:

  • Set up accountability. Decided to stick with Word Press for this. Mostly because not many people will actually read this or take much notice, but will also be a decent record for me, and if people do start to see it, well it is just more accountability. I can also link to the Dashboard on THPE forums.
  • Learn more about my personality quiz results – read up on them. I am an ISFJ-T and I have close to no idea what that means. I took the quiz last year and never really took it further than doing the quiz. Ive not yet done much reading other than going back to my results, so this one still needs to be ticked off. Its on my “to do” list
  • Chose a one-word theme. My trainer helped me a heap with this. One day while getting my arse served to me, I had mentioned this and we were trying to think of a one-word theme that would sum up what I wanted to achieve. What was I striving for? We were deep discussion, when I started to put down the exercise I was doing and said out loud “No, Karen, you can do better than that” and, pointing at me, we both had the “ah-ha” moment. My word for the year is BETTER. In all its forms. I want to BE better, in mind, body and spirit. I DESERVE better. I CAN BE better. My trainer said I should also include I will DEMAND better, but I needs to honestly believe I deserve it first. And that’s something to work on. I was pretty happy when the lightbulb moment came, and I am still chuffed at my 2020 theme!
  • Start on my 20 for 20. Again, something I lacked in achieving last year, and I will repeat attempt a couple of things, but I will be more realistic with my time and expectations. It’s a work in progress.
  • Final resolution was to download and begin listening to “The Happiness Project audiobook. Which I have done. There’s still several hours of listening to go, and sadly My Favourite Murder (THE best podcast, like ever) will have to take a back seat for now, but just means I will get to binge listen again once ive finished the book. To be honest, I’m finding it in a few sections to be irrelevant to me for now, but I will try and retain some of the details for if (when) I do ever get a partner/husband. Its so far all good information, but not something am finding I can relate to. But I will persevere. 

Well, January is over with. Now to get onto February resolutions and catching up on the January resolutions I’ve not yet finished. But I am being kind to myself and giving myself a bit of a break. I didn’t get started till Mid January, so while not making excuses, I am also not being so bloody hard on myself.

Not sure if anyone will read this, but if you do, I hope you enjoy and join me on my Happiness Project, and if not, well no harm no foul..

 

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